Christmas in Heaven...

I was talking with my mom the other day about Ella and Christmas last year, and how much fun it would have been to buy clothes and toys for her this year.. I said something along the lines, of even if she could come back, she wouldn't..who would want to leave Heaven? and then I got to thinking about how glorious Christmas day must be in Heaven.. Christmas with Christ himself! who in the right mind would want to come back.. I smiled as I thought about this.. I miss her and always will, but I am so happy for her.. I am so happy that all she knew in this world was love, and now all she knows is our fathers love.. and best of all, she gets to celebrate Christmas in Heaven.. Can you just imagine?


My First Christmas in Heaven

I see the countless Christmas trees around the world below
With tiny lights, like Heaven's stars, reflecting on the snow
The sight is so spectacular, please wipe away the tear
For I am spending Christmas with Jesus Christ this year
I hear the many Christmas songs that people hold so dear
But the sounds of music can't compare with the Christmas choir up here
I have no words to tell you, the joy their voices bring
For it is beyond description, to hear the angels sing
I know how much you miss me
You know I hold you dear
And be glad I'm spending Christmas with Jesus Christ this year
I sent you each a special gift
From my heavenly home above
I sent you each a memory of my undying love
After all, love is a gift more precious than pure gold
It was always most important in the stories Jesus told
Please love and keep each other
As my Father said to do
For I can't count the blessing or love he has for each of you
So have a Merry Christmas
And wipe away that tear:
Remember, I am spending Christmas with Jesus Christ this year.
~author unknown

sickly Cayden

Yesterday about 9am I took Cayden into the urgent care to be seen. Over night he had developed a low grade fever, sore throat and horrible cough.. last week my dad had the H1n1 virus (swine flu) and I talked to C's doctor to see about what to do if C showed symptoms, he said take him in immediately because his asthma could complicate things..fast forward to yesterday.. He is coughing, but seems okay otherwise.. the Dr checks him out.. he has a horrible ear infection (which he had not complained about??) and you guessed it h1n1 and his lungs sounded horrible.. they did a breathing treatment on him and then a peak flow, which he failed miserably.. so we came home with 5 different meds.. last night he was playing his PSP and the TV was on..neither of us paying much attention.. and the news came on with this story..Cayden paused his game and looked at me.. I looked at him and asked what was wrong and he said "I need you to tell me I am going to be okay".. I paused and then nodded and explained that we were doing everything they would do in the hospital for him and that he WAS going to be okay.. the other kids that had passed probably didn't get seen as early as he did.. and that was enough for him..he just needed to hear it.. In the back of my mind though, rushed awful thoughts.. I just sat and prayed for a minute or two, please God, give him comfort and peace of mind and restore his health quickly..Oh God, I need to know that he is going to be okay!! My mind kept rushing all night, I kept feeling his head and chest with my hand and checking on him.. finally that silent whisper I've heard a few times before .."Be still and know that I am God" and just like that I was able to rest.. Caydens cough is a little better today, but the flu part is starting to kick in.. praying this is over fast..