It stops, the calls, the emails, the FB messages...I don't know to be happy that I have finally gotten past the point where people feel the need and can stop "checking in on me" or sad that contact stopped all together.. I am doing (mostly) okay and don't cry at the drop of a hat anymore..sometimes I can even talk about her and not break down...but I still need friends.. I need normalcy. I need to talk about things that aren't about my deceased child.. I know most of my friendships, if not all, the detachment has came on my part.. I declined meals and going out and meeting up for so long. Ella was sick and then I was just plain not wanting to leave my comfort zone..But I am needing that again...I need human contact again.. and I am in serious need of normalcy..friends.. laughing, all of it..I know it's all my doing..I am mourning several friendships now too.. that I want back..any other BLM's going through this? How do you un-do this?
Thanks to Amanda A. for calling me so late to listen to me whine and to give me some long distance love...it made me feel better and I was able to finally drift to sleep..love you..you are a good friend to me, and thank you for sticking by me even though I am a mess sometimes..