Tuesday, June 9, 2009

to camp or not to camp...

well that was the question..

**Monday 6am- we all got up bright and early to get Cayden ready and on the bus to Joplin for his first year of church camp. He really wanted to go, and I really was not ready. I knew that he had least had to try though and who knows...maybe..just MAYBE he would do okay...
**Monday 3pm, 6:30pm, etc etc... several calls from cousin Katies phone Monday afternoon..and hearing about how some of his money was stolen, he was thrown in a disgusting pond, and there were kids that weren't very nice, and not to mention "having to sleep in a chicken coop with all of these boys" he made the choice camp was not for him..not for now at least. He called last night about 10:30 and said he just wanted to come home.. I told him to sleep on it and if he wanted to come home, to call me this morning...
**Tuesday 8:15am.. BIG surprise my phone rings..cayden says "mom, I just cant handle this and I need to come home" So Jay is in the Grove area this weekend for a paintball tourney and so he drove to Joplin and Erin and I drove to Grove and met them, ate lunch and Erin and I drove back and Cayden stayed with Jay.. so we drove that way to see them for about an hour and had to turn back around and come home.. that's okay though.. as long as he is happy and Jay will bring him home tomorrow night..
So camp this year was not a success.. I think he's just not ready to be apart from us just yet.. since Ella passed he has been so loving and sweet...and a tad clingy.. its only been 3 weeks today, I don't think anyone can predict how we will feel from day to day, or even hour to hour for that fact..C doesnt talk much about Ella's passing.. he talks about this or that, but not about how he feels or anything like that.. some days he seems okay and others he is quiet and stays to himself.. I am making some calls to have him and us see a grief counselor. I THINK cayden is dealing as well as can be expected, but I want to make sure that he is okay.. I have been having awful nightmares nightly, not even always about Ella..but I am sure it is due to everything and the stress lately... I know things will level out for us all again.. hopefully sooner than later :)

He seemed excited to go.. here is on the bus before they left...


He is really such a great kid and we are so incredibly blessed by having him. He is so beautiful, funny, caring, and smart! Sometimes he makes us a little crazy, but Wow.. I love him so much and am so thankful for him and his health..

This is C, Elizabeth and Joey.. cayden loves Joey and was/is such a great big brother.. I loved seeing him with Ella and love seeing him with our friends and family's kids.. it makes him seem complete when he's toting and entertaining a toddler ;)



(nevermind the filthy sliding door..that's emberassing!)

6 comments:

dg darling said...

We love you in spite of the dirty door:). We're praying for your whole family and will send up some extra for Cayden.

Stephen said...

LOL Hes such a dork lol

Annie said...

Well, who would like to be pushed into a yucky pond and sleep in a chicken coop? Praying for Cayden, you, and Jay. He'll probably enjoy camp when he gets older. He does seem to be precious to little ones, love the pic of him holding up the two little kids. What a sweetie you have!

Mandi said...

I can just imagine he didn't like it there with all that going on, that's just not how he rolls :0) I'm also quite certain he is instead having the time of his life right now with his Daddy and all the boys at D-Day!! He'll have to give Kevin a hard time about getting to D-Day before him ;0) Love that boy!!!

Heather Lyon said...

jen,
Devyn called me last night and told me bout cayden leaving, hope is doing better now. Devyn isn't doing that great himself. he is having fun and horribly sunburnt cuz someone stole his sunscreen but he misses us something fierce. he was crying because he can't sleep, i don't blame him what with the chichken coop and all. i don't know if he will make it the entire week. i miss him too....

Janis @ SneakPeek said...

Sorry to hear that C didn't have a good time, but maybe next year will be better. I think the grief counseling would be good, I am sure he feels the loss of his little angel sister. Maybe he keeps quiet so as not to upset you. Brave boy, camp or no camp!