Monday, February 22, 2010

dumb...

I have blogged about emails from the miscellaneous baby info folks. Yesterday Ella would have been 18 months old, so of course I got one that snuck through the cracks..( I have unsubscribed several times) and being the glutton for punishment that I am..what did I do? delete it and ignore..no I opened and read it.. big.dumb.idiot. I glanced and this part caught my eye..

She may like to copy what other people do. For example, your baby likes to imitate you and stretch his or her arms up high when you play "so big!" 

and it started..epic failure..when Cayden was little we did the "how big is Cayden" and he would laugh in anticipation of the ever-so-hilariousness of the "SO BIG"..and he would randomly do it himself and just laugh and laugh..so cute..so when I read this it was another cruel reminder of things we would miss with Ella..I can just imagine her laughing with excitement of what was coming..she laughed all the time, had this sweet little laugh and her eyes would open huge and it was the cutest thing ever.. so all day was crap. Jay was in a bad mood. I was in a bad mood. it was bad. so we decided to just take a break.. we took cayden to a movie and just got away for a bit, got our mind off of everything that was upsetting us.. I know one day I will be able to think of these things and smile..that day just was not yesterday..

5 comments:

Franchesca said...

I am so sorry. I hope your day where you can smile and be at peace is not so far away. Thinking of you and your precious baby girl.

xo

Mary said...

I still get those emails too from place like the bump or the nest something like that. I haven't unsubcribed myself because I hope to one day be able to look at them. I just delete them for now. Sorry that it brought your day down.

Holly said...

Those reminders can be awful. How are they still managing to get to your inbox!? Geez. I hope there are better days ahead for you.

Kelli said...

I'm so sorry, Jen. Your posts always make me get that big knot in my throat. I think of Ella so often when I look at my Lily. Not really sure why, but I do.

Adriana Davies said...

I was getting so many of those emails that I finally had to just change email addys because it seemed like the more I "unsubscribed" the more emails I got and dont get me started on the actual mail I was always getting! UGH! Im sorry that you had to get that email and that it had to hit that much harder... like you said, maybe one day your emotions towards them will be different... *hugs from FL!*