Tuesday, November 3, 2009

what I have learned from Ella

I've learned that you can keep going long after you think you can't.
~ I never thought I could "make it through" the loss of a child..I never imagined having to actually do either..

I've learned that learning to forgive takes a lot of practice and time.

I've learned that friends can become strangers, and strangers can become friends.

I've learned that ignorance isn't an excuse for the lack of compassion.
~this is so true, I HATE it when people say, well they don't know what to say or they don't want to upset you..A..there in no right thing to say, maybe print this out and give to them and B.. we are already upset..we buried our daughter..what could you possibly say to make it any worse? just be there..don't worry about what to say.. let us know you care..thats enough..

I've learned that some people will never, ever - "get it".

I've learned that the community of sorrow is the strongest of all.

I've learned that no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.
*sigh..this is one of the hardest things I deal with..

I've learned that your life can be changed in a matter of minutes.
Feb 2nd, 2009... a five minute phone call forever changed our lives..

I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon.

I've learned that love isn't measured by the amount of time you have with someone.
8 months and 29 days with her, and we love her just as much as Cayden and/or any other future children..she is with us forever, even though she is not "with us" here..
I've learned that some sorrow is so deep that it has no words. But so is love.


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I just came across this and thought I would share.. i edited a few thing and took out a few since they did not apply to me, but for the most part its the same..

16 comments:

Missing Kasey said...

This is all so true! ((hugs))

Debbie said...

I can relate to many of these...most recently the one about friends and strangers...A childhood friend of mine has caused me more grief since my child has become sick, making ME feel guilty if I don't call her etc.
Some of the biggest cheerleaders in our lives are the people we have never met,and only know through this cyber-world.

I have learned that I no longer have tolerance or patience for people that suck the life out of me.... Buh Bye!!!!

Tiffany Lockette said...

Thinking of you today and always. I hope and pray that each day will be more peaceful than the last. My heart is with you.

The Blue Sparrow said...

Wow, I really like this post. It is so very true, Sadly. *HUGS*

The Morris Family said...

Your right on all the points, some are more prominent personally, like people you've never met become friends because they know your pain. Some will never get it as they have not lost, and oh so yes to the pain and sorrow is so deep, there are no words to describe, I guess only tears. But one thing I know more than ever NOW, is that my Jesus is so mighty, so perfect, filling in where the hole is so deep and the Words of scriptures have been my life support and because of that I can get up each day.

Cindy

Kristy said...

All of them are true, every single one. *hugs*

Franchesca Cox said...

So true...

Holly said...

This is good and I agree with it!! Thank you for sharing it!

Lea said...

Jen - thanks for these...

"I've learned that some sorrow is so deep that it has no words. "

Yes, yes and yes.

Akul's mama said...

A resounding YES to all you have said.

Anonymous said...

Thank you so much for posting this - I needed it. I lost my daughter in June when she was 2 days old - it just never seems to get easier - I am always so sad. I miss my little Madelyn Faith.

Malory said...

Great post & sadly very true.

Rachel said...

Great find... I right now, dont think I will be able to go on.

Amy said...

I remember sitting in Houston with a 6 week old Logan in my lap and crying, praying and mourning for you in February. I only "know" you through Erin, but you became my sister on that day. I know the feeling of wondering when, not if, things will begin to crumble around my family.

A sick child is such a character buiding, faith questioning, self discovering experience......and you are showing all of us what you have been placed on this earth for - you are mommy to Cayden and Ella. What a GLORIOUS purpose!

Kelly @ The Beauty of Sufficient Grace said...

I really liked this post. Thank you so much for sharing this...

A Dragonfly's Embrace said...

Oh how I wish those weren't so true.

Peace,
Ben